Her decision to give up is the only reason that she is alive right now. It gave her the opportunity to be here to try her luck again. She heard later that Soverick came out and killed everyone. That news sobered her up and removed her confidence in her title. That is not the first time something like that happened. She had been confident before too. She wanted to fight Soverick because of that confidence. It didn't end well.
Back then, she considered Soverick a weakling for hiding and refusing to fight her. He defeated her soundly and effortlessly when he did fight her but it seemed that some of her confidence remained. The calamity of the child of the plane removed her confidence thoroughly and he didn't even have to defeat her to do so. It was then that she began to fear him and the heart devil formed within her.
So no, she doesn't have confidence in her title to defeat Soverick. She doesn't have confidence in her bloodline advantage either. She also doesn't have confidence that she will be able to beat him because of the suppression during this competition. Again, it is more accurate to say that the suppression doesn't give her confidence anymore.
She used to have just a little confidence in the suppression and she thought it would be enough for her to defeat Soverick or at least match him in the competition. That's why she decided to participate in this competition in the first place.
The announcements of his feats have shown that her confidence was wrongly placed. Again and again, her confidence and self-esteem have been built up only to be mercilessly torn down. It is not surprising that she has a soul-deep fear for him.
She sighed and asked no one in particular, "What a monster. How do you defeat such a being?"
The simple thought of Soverick always makes her unhappy. She could be laughing one moment and then frowning the next because of Soverick. His simple existence is making her life unpleasant. She is unresigned even when she knows what a monster he is. No one should live like her forever in fear of someone else. But that's not the major reason why she has to eliminate Soverick.
She doesn't have any confidence in defeating him but she has to or she won't be able to pass any tribulations in the future. A heart devil is a terrible thing. A heart devil based on Soverick Ghastorix and his glorious feats is virtually an impossible barrier to beat. It will be impossible for her to pass her tribulations if such a heart devil shows up. And it will surely show up because Soverick Ghastorix never fails to deliver.
So she is always thinking of ways to defeat him. This competition with its unique opportunity that is supposed to make them equals should have been her opportunity to defeat him. Her chance to rid herself of her fear of Soverick should have finally come but the notification about him already reaching rank 9 is not encouraging.
She almost believes that the notifications are done to torture her specifically. Each one of them tells her how lacking she is compared to him. And each time she hears the notification, her confidence dies a little until it is completely dead as it is right now. She made away with the notion of ever beating him the more she heard of his exploits and feats.
'I shouldn't have come at all.' she thought to herself in regret.
Beating other people is fun but it is not what she came here to achieve. What she wants to achieve is unattainable so it makes it seem like she has wasted her time and her peace of mind by attending the competition. It would have been better for her not to attend the competition at all. Then she would have the privilege to preserve a modicum of her confidence. Ignorance is bliss after all.
She was deep in thought as she strolled through the forest totally unconcerned about the dangers all around her. It is not because she is clueless or unaware of how dangerous her environment is. Her nonchalance is because she can't sense anything that can be a danger to her. It is a sense that her bloodline has empowered her with.
Her bloodline makes her very sensitive to danger and good fortune. It has helped her to always find herself in pleasant situations. It is why she doesn't bother to pick a direction to follow. She follows the instincts of her bloodline and trusts it to lead her right. It has always worked alright until now.
She didn't head towards the mountain at the center of the arena. Her bloodline believes she is not ready for that yet so it leads her around the arena. Every single encounter she has had in the challenge has always been in her favor. She meets beasts that she can defeats and chances upon wounded competitors that she can easily kill for their score. It has all been good for her apart from the occasional notification about the monster that is Soverick Ghastorix.
She stopped and looked ahead as she sensed someone coming towards her. Their paths cross and this person will meet her if she continues on this path. It is possible for her to avoid this person now by going in another direction. Her bloodline sensed uncertainty from the person and it made her narrow her eyes in their direction.
'It seems I have to be very careful. Who could make me so cautious?' she wondered.
She became wary of this encounter because her bloodline can sense two opposite outcomes from this person. This person is a danger to her and also a boon. The outcome of their encounter will determine which one it is not the encounter itself. Her encounter with this person could be favorable or unpleasant. She is not confused or perplexed about this situation because this is not the first time she has experienced something like this.contemporary romance
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