The other must have been contemplating whether he should answer him or not that why he had been quiet until now.
What he knew from the other's family situation was that his father died from a violent crime when he was eight. Then, his mother kind of had a mental breakdown from that and could no longer take care of Shen Ji Yun. Uncle Yi Mu was the one who took the responsibility of being the other's guardian.
Just listening to that shorten version, anyone could tell that it was a very complicated and sad situation. Any child in Shen Ji Yun's place would definitely harbor a feeling of resentment from that. But instead, all he could feel from Shen Ji Yun was a feeling of sadness.
Luo Yan didn't want to force the other to tell him anything. Although he very much preferred it if he did, because that way, he could then comfort him. But that would only work if Shen Ji Yun told it to him on his own accord and not because he was pressured to do so.
Knowing the other, he would surely tell it to him just because of the simple reason that he asked. And Luo Yan didn't want that.
Shen Ji Yun stared at Luo Yan's hand that was atop his. Although this was inside a VR game, he had an illusion that he could feel the warmth from that hand. He raised his head.
Luo Yan was smiling gently at him. The other's gaze was clearly saying, 'you don't have to force yourself to tell me anything, I will wait for you until you're ready'. That illusionary warmth Shen Ji Yun felt suddenly became very real at that moment.
He was about to say his answer when the train suddenly started to move. Both of them looked outside the window too see the moving scenery.
It would take quite a while before they arrived at Yule Island. Travelling via the Sky Train was actually part of the experience of going there. The time left before they arrived at the island was probably enough to tell Luo Yan his story.
Shen Ji Yun moved his hand under Luo Yan's palm and intertwined their fingers together. As if he was trying to get enough willpower from the other. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. When he finally opened his eyes, he already knew what to do next.
"When my father was still alive, our family had the most wonderful Christmas," he started. "It's my mother's favorite holiday, you see. That's why my dad always put a lot of effort into celebrating it. The decorations, the gifts, the food, Dad would even dress up as Santa. But on the eve of Christmas when I was eight, a nightmare happened that changed everything."
He paused. Attempting to remember what happened back then was already paralyzing. The fear, the anger, the sadness, all these emotions slowly bubbling inside him.
Then, he felt a soft squeeze in his hand. He looked up and saw Luo Yan with an encouraging gaze. As if silently giving him strength. He smiled softly. And finally found the courage to continue.
"That year my parents decided to celebrate Christmas at New York City. My mother wanted my Dad and I to see the biggest Christmas tree in the world, you see. She had been there quite a number of times before but Dad had never been there. Of course, it's the same for me. When that discussion came up, they just decided to simply celebrate Christmas there.
"On the night before Christmas, we went to the Rockefeller Center where the Christmas tree was. At that time, in the eyes of an eight-years-old, everything seemed to be so magical. The light decorations, the light dusting of snow, the ice rink beneath the huge Christmas tree, it was all like a magnificent feast. I truly felt like it was the most amazing and fun night of my life. I didn't expect that it would all change in just a few hours.
"After we enjoyed everything the place could offer, my parents decided to call it a night. Being a child, by the time we decided to return to our hotel, I was already so sleepy that I couldn't even walk on my own. My Dad had to carry me. I don't really remembered much of what happened after. I just remembered being thrown into my mother's arms and hearing her scream.
"When I opened my eyes, I saw my Dad fighting off with a man. Then, there was that terrible loud sound like a canon going off. It was only later that I found out that it's the sound of gunshot. Then, my Dad fell back and all I could see was red. Red everywhere."
Shen Ji Yun closed his eyes. Although there were details of that night that he could now barely remember, the look on his father's face when he fell down, as well as his state, was still so vivid in his mind. As if it just happened yesterday.
The moment when his father fell down, the other turned to him and his mother. His expression was like that of someone who knew that it would be the last time he would see his son and wife.
His father raised his hand, trying to reach them. But his hand only fell down on the hard gravel. Then, red bloomed on his chest. And then, blood scattered on the place where he fell down. Turning the falling white snow into that ominous red.
Shen Ji Yun once again felt that usual stabbing feeling he always felt whenever he was reminded of that moment. It was so excruciatingly painful, as if his heart was slowly being cut into pieces. He could feel himself being out of breath. It's like he was being put into a grinder while being drowned at the same time.
And that's when he felt a pair of soft yet strong arms wrapping around him, enveloping him with endless warmth.
contemporary romance
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